on holidays

oh well i know that i have issues but at least i now know that they certainly ain't caused by my job. never thought they were but the fact that i still have these rejection issues on holiday means that my job is fine.

anyway as mentioned before i'm on holiday. now imo some of my friendships are THIS close to ending. its apparant that some ppl have issues with me but of course they never tell me. If they are true friends then you'd think they'd tell you but i guess they're not true friends so i'll leave it up to them to sort their shit out. i have better things to do.... meant to be windy today

of my mates that do care (and some of them are genuine) i got a haircut from Tim on saturday arvo. Tim is still keen on hanging out and he's great at cutting hair too. although i'm of the opinion now that my forehead MUST be covered cos it is UGLY... so next time Tim we'll leave the fringe nice and long... cheers mate. that basically all i'd change... the lines on da side look cool and so does the mohawk at da top. Now Tim and i have been friends for ages.... and at da mo he's currently my best friend. i've been friends with him since 1992 and especially at da start we had flashpoints... but our friendship has stood the test of time.... so i'm hoping that i can apply the same principles that Tim and i learnt to these other friendships (one of them is now more like an aquantance). next year will be interesting. summer will be a big test cos this is when we tend to hang out the most. despite our issues as of late i do expect me and Jaxx to start hanging out again over the summer months... at the mo it is clear that she ain't remotely keen on txtin me.... let alone hanging out... and i have no idea why. But Jaxx is by no means the only friend thats giving me the cold shoulder... Eva and i too have had our moments. These guys pride themselves on being strait up but they never are of course.... its all show. the friendship between me and Eva though has one big insurance policy... Devon. Him and i get on great. Devon is Eva's bf and him and i go to the gym most days so its not like Eva can rid herself of me by not being my friend haha. Jaxx's kids too like having me around but as i don't specifcally hang with them i doubt they will play much of a role in keepping me and Jaxx friends. The best tonic for me and Jaxx is prob distance. Eva's organising a few outings this week... and yes i'll be going.... Jaxx prob won't be. Other friendsships too are on the outer.... not just cos of issues between me and them.... but cos of other factors. i knew this was gonna happen WAY back.... but i never cared cos i had only one thing on my mind... surfing from 1997 to 1999, windsurfing from 1999 to 2001 and kitesurfing from 2001 to 2007. I still kitesurf but in 2008 i lost interest... the passion... and that is why i've been moody the last 18 months.

there are two big issues that are stopping me from getting FULLY back into kiting... one is that summer is just around the corner. Auckland summers are not good for kitesurfing but great fior everything else... inclujding hanging with mates... especially Jaxx, Eva, Duff etc. so silly for me to make that move just yet. Once summer fininshes though the doors start opening up just a tad wider.

The other factor is work. its an unpredictable finish at post.... at the mo i seem to very slow at doin my mail.... if i get addicted to kiting again it will cause huge anxiety issues at my job... and i became a postie to escape stress so untill i leave nzpost i will never HARDCORE get addicted to kiting... and i have no immediate plans to leave a great job like nzp thats for sure.

and now for holidays...